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What today’s young people need to thrive–tough standards with encouragement: psychology professor

A scholar says he has uncovered the trick to bringing out the best in Gen Z and Gen Alpha — compliment them. But not in the traditional sense — it’s more about believing in them, and letting them know it.

David Yeager, a psychology professor at the University of Texas at Austin and co-founder of the Texas Behavioral Science and Policy Institute, explains the nuances of his advice in his forthcoming book “10 to 25: The Science of Motivating Young People,” slated to be published this week.

“Studies continue to show that when you hold young people to high standards and make it clear that you believe they can meet them, you are showing respect by taking them seriously. Young people rise to meet the challenge because being respected is motivating,” Yeager wrote in an op-ed for The Wall Street Journal on Aug. 1.

Yeager has coined a term to describe the type of compliment he is describing: “wise feedback.” He wrote that the old compliment sandwich — criticism between two pieces of praise — isn’t working on Gen Z, or those born between 1997 and 2012, and Gen Alpha, the generations that follows:

The problem is that young people don’t like the sandwich. Research shows that when young people are being critiqued by an authority figure, they are not interested in whether the coach, boss, parent or teacher is a positive person. Rather, they are asking themselves a deeper, more existential question: Does this person who has power over my life think I’m incompetent? Notwithstanding claims that Generation Z is uniquely anxious and sensitive, this is a universal concern—one that grows out of what it means to be young, with a yearning to make your name, or at least not to look bad in front of people whose opinions you care about.

The compliment sandwich is meant to create an atmosphere of safety and security, but if the praise is for something seemingly unimportant, it won’t address a young person’s fears of unworthiness. Rather, it may be seen as condescending, which can confirm anxieties about being seen as a rube. Studies show that young people are especially hungry for signs of social status and respect, so they are especially insulted when they sense they are being talked down to.

Instead, Yeager advises, under the “wise feedback” paradigm, tell young people the truth — shoot straight about where they need to improve — but let them know you believe they can rise to the occasion.

He cites in his op-ed a study in which teachers gave some students wise-feedback notes on their essays, while another group of students just had their essays graded without the note of encouragement.

“We hoped that the wise feedback would motivate students in the treatment group to work harder on their revisions, but even we were surprised by how strongly they responded. In results published in 2014, we found that students were twice as likely to revise their essays after receiving the wise-feedback note: 40% of students in the control group revised their essays, compared with 80% of the treatment group,” Yeager wrote.

“The next year, when we ran the study with new students in the same teachers’ classes, we required all students to revise their essays instead of making it an option. We wanted to see if receiving the wise-feedback note would encourage students to push themselves to do better. Again, it worked. We found that students who received the note made more than twice as many of the teachers’ suggested corrections as those in the control group.”

The book’s online description notes Yeager also delves into what he calls the the “mentor mindset” to bring the best out of young people.

“Anyone can adopt the mentor mindset by following a few highly effective and easy-to-learn practices such as validating young people’s perspectives (rather than dismissing them), asking them questions (rather than telling them what to do), being transparent about your beliefs and goals (rather than assuming that they will accurately guess your thoughts), and holding them to high standards (rather than coddling them),” the book description states.

MORE: Gen Z writer: Don’t make others ‘pay off your poor financial decisions’

IMAGE: ESB Professional / Shutterstock

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Jennifer Kabbany is editor-in-chief of The College Fix.