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The College Fix’s 20 most outrageous campus stories of spring 2024 semester

OPINION: Zany professors. Absurd cancel culture incidents. Students running amok.

News on higher education these past six months has been dominated by coverage of the virulent anti-Israel protests that have engulfed campuses nationwide, and rightly so.

But amid headlines of quad encampments and police in riot gear arresting lawless protesters, there was still plenty of ridiculousness to be had in academia.

Between the zany professors, absurd cancel culture incidents, and students running amok, campuses continued to illustrate why so many Americans have lost confidence in their institutions of higher learning.

As the spring 2024 semester comes to a close, The College Fix offers — in no particular order — a highlight reel of some of the most outrageous moments campus life has proffered, a mix of both hilarious absurdity and troubling trends.

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1. CU Boulder professor dresses like butterfly to fight ‘climate anxiety’
Yes, we mean literally. … read more

2. Oregon university will no longer give D- and F grades
Remember the good old days when kids were actually expected to learn? … read more

3. Elite university changes ‘SA’ acronym to avoid triggering students
This country is screwed.read more

4. Professor labels Michelangelo painting example of ‘white supremacy’
The left despises true beauty. And also, everything is racist. … read more

5. Professor worries too many robots are … white
Good to see scholars are focused on the important things. … read more

6. ‘Whites are psychopaths’ guest lecture at UCSF
You’ve gotta watch the video, the professor said it so matter-of-factly. … read more

7. University of Houston erects ‘Satanic’ art exhibit
Because why not? … read more

8. Syracuse microaggressions workshop: Looking at a service animal ‘micro-assault’
They’re scaping the bottom of the barrel with this one. … read more

9. University defends Glitter+Ash ‘queer’ Lent observance amid backlash
Can you imagine the outrage if it was a queer Ramadan observance? … read more

10. ‘Slightly racist to be a Taylor Swift fan,’ professor says
Swifties are annoying, but they don’t deserve to be called racist. … read more

11. West Point ditches ‘Duty, Honor, Country’ from mission statement
The Left won’t be satisfied until they’ve neutered the entire armed services. … read more

12. University’s ‘Ejaculate Responsibly’ campaign blames men for unwanted pregnancies
There’s a punchline here somewhere. … read more

13. Marriage promotes ‘white supremacy’: George Mason professor
Next they’ll be blaming divorce on white supremacy, too. … read more

14. College forces athletes to watch ‘only whites are racist’ video
We’re sensing a theme, here. … read more

15. Mandatory ‘prayer’ to ‘Mama Earth’ in UCLA med school ‘structural racism’ class
Secular progressives gonna secular progressive. … read more

16. Avoid term ‘peanut gallery,’ UNC dorm group social justice training warns
Why don’t we all just stop talking now and switch to ASL, far more inclusive. … read more

17. Native tribe against moon colonization gives blessing to anti-Israel activists to use ‘their’ land
Native Americans are the only ones who get to pretend they never had conquest in their history. … read more

18. Mandatory ASU course teaches journalism students asking ‘Where are you from?’ is racist
Of course they want to teach journalists to be afraid of their own shadow, suits their agenda. … read more

19. Pro-Palestinian GWU student ‘tribunal’ calls for campus leaders to be beheaded on guillotines
Something tells us they missed the lecture on the French Revolution. … read more

20. Term ‘gynecologist’ offensive, according to scholars
Probably not a shocker to learn ‘breastfeeding’ also a no-no. … read more

MORE: The College Fix’s top 10 most outrageous stories of 2023

IMAGE: Michael Heim / Shutterstock

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About the Author
Fix Editor
Jennifer Kabbany is editor-in-chief of The College Fix.